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An Official Orkish Apology

Posted: 2013-04-01
by Warboss Gutzmangul
Greetings Fellow Darkonians,

War has gripped the lands of Darkon and has caused the deaths of countless innocents. As Warboss of Waaagh! Gutzmangul, it has become clear that I must take my boyz in the direction of peaceful negotiations with our neighbors. I want to apologize to Chosen Blood and to Archduke Slindar and anyone we ever gruesomely butchered. The truth is, we orks just want to be loved and accepted for who we are, not who we're pretending to be. The Truth is I am actually quite well-spoken as are the other members of my country. We've just been wearing a mask.

When we came to Darkon, we were met with a plethora of responses. Some were thrilled that a horde of bloodthirsty orks was about to descend upon Darkon. Some treated us with contempt; no better than beasts. The truth is, the expectations of the realm were thrust upon us. People saw us as bloodthirsty orks and that's what we became.

The realm is a judgmental place and everyone needs to fit in their little boxes. Everyone has to fulfill the role provided to them by the realm. Be honest with yourself. Would you accept a Nurgling that values cleanliness? An Elidorian that doesn't have a bit of distinguished grey? A Laconian that is attracted to a member the opposite sex? No. You would shun them. As I have shunned them just so my boyz and I would not be the next target of ridicule. An ork would rather become a vicious psychopath and die incredibly violently than face the withering scorn of our peers.

Occasionally, the pressure gets so bad that we can't even bring ourselves to come out to face the realm. People ask "Were were the orks a few weeks back?" The truth is... we were having a group sympathy circle. We cry and talk about our feelings. It's a space where no one is allowed to judge anyone and we're allowed to wallow in self pity and eat ice cream.

So please, I'm asking the realm to accept who we really are. I'm sorry for the deception and I'm sorry for the countless sentient beings we've killed. We are complex. We are a sensitive people. We are a caring people and we want the realm to accept that. We don't want to fight anymore. We just want to go about our lives and co-exist peacefully with the rest of Darkon. I hope you can all understand where I'm coming from.

Sincerely,
Mr. Gutzmangul
Executive Director of Waaagh! Gutzmangul

Re: An Official Orkish Apology

Posted: 2013-04-01
by Lord Dubh
((Let us know if this is a HACKED account and we will delete))

Re: An Official Orkish Apology

Posted: 2013-04-01
by PadreCaedes
Warboss Gutzmangul wrote:Be honest with yourself. Would you accept a Nurgling that values cleanliness? An Elidorian that doesn't have a bit of distinguished grey? A Laconian that is attracted to a member the opposite sex? No. You would shun them.


(And that's where I legitimately fell out of my chair laughing. That being said...my head hurts...carry on)

Re: An Official Orkish Apology

Posted: 2013-04-01
by Occultus
AND I WONT HUNTS ORKS AN-E-MOAR.

Re: An Official Orkish Apology

Posted: 2013-04-01
by Warboss Gutzmangul
Lord Dubh wrote:((Let us know if this is a HACKED account and we will delete))

((Check today's date))

Re: An Official Orkish Apology

Posted: 2013-04-01
by fingers630
Warboss Gutzmangul wrote:
Lord Dubh wrote:((Let us know if this is a HACKED account and we will delete))

((Check today's date))



snicker

Re: An Official Orkish Apology

Posted: 2013-04-01
by Lord Dubh
Warboss Gutzmangul wrote:
Lord Dubh wrote:((Let us know if this is a HACKED account and we will delete))

((Check today's date))



((Just checking))

Re: An Official Orkish Apology

Posted: 2013-04-01
by Lord Cailen Sendor
I for one will accept you and your nation as you are and as you will be and you have the right to be who ever that truly is, as long as it does not infringe on the rights of others in the Realm to be who they are.

In service,
HRM Cailen Sendor
(rofl well played)

Re: An Official Orkish Apology

Posted: 2013-04-02
by Warboss Gutzmangul
Oi! You lot can ferget all dat stuff wot got sent out. Seemz like sum soft-'eaded humie got inter me messenger squigs an' sent dis out. I wuz gunna kill 'im, but 'ee said it wuz fer Aperfoolz er sumfin. 'Ee said you wuz supposed ta do funny stuff ta people. So we stuffed 'im 'ead-first down a squig 'ole an' waited fer da screamin' an' da kickin' ta stop. Now DAT wuz funny!!

So yeah, no 'pology from me. Chosen Blood an' da ol used-ta-be king can go zog demselves an' die afore I 'pologize.

ORKZ IZ MADE FER FIGHTIN'! AN' WE'Z BRINGIN' DA WAAAAGH!!!

Re: An Official Orkish Apology

Posted: 2013-04-03
by Artex
This is what happens when you make Orks out of Fungus.

*Steps on one of his Goblin's heads and crushes it* See that. Our kind are made of flesh and bone. No spores. It lets our brains function properly.

Re: An Official Orkish Apology

Posted: 2013-04-03
by Warboss Gutzmangul
Ain't no one in Darkon smarter den me.